Feeling a little bit down at the moment. I’m exercising and writing every day at least.
I’m thinking and thinking. I was going to write I have no idea why I am feeling a little bit down. But I think I know. It’s different factors that makes me feel like this.
1. I let myself feel like this
I feel like this because I holding on to… stuff. Just let go.
2. I don’t feel I belong here
I feel alienated. They speaking Chinese but it feels like I don’t understand it. And a lot of people speal Taiwanese and I definitely doesn’t understand that.
3. I wish I was different
I wish I was outgoing. I wish I knew what to do in every situation. I wish I wish I wish.
I’m feeling useless. I know nothing and I can’t help with anything. I feel cheap because I don’t want to spend money. When I try to help they don’t let me (when I can help). It seems like everyone else have to plan or else I just stay at home. And I feel boring because I am staying at home. I’m in a new country, go out and explore. The thing is. I want to save money.
I think… No, I know that number 2 and 3 are big causes. Let go of all expectations and what other think.
Easier said than done.