I’ve been thinking back on my life a little bit and had a little bit of fun analyzing it. So now I’m going to show my findings and conclusions.
In my early years I was the king, the center of the universe. Everything was about me. I always get what I want. If not I’m going to make your life a hell. Btw, I was always right, no matter what. I think you can summarize my early years as that. Of course I don’t remember most of my early years. But I’ve heard stories. Funny ones now, but probably very annoying for the adults that had to deal with me back then. In short, I was an annoying little bastard.
The first shift I think happened when I was seven years old. I was starting school by then. First grade. The thing is my parent assigned me to another school. I didn’t know anyone at the new school. All my friends everybody I knew started in another school. I don’t really know what happened but I became obedient. I made the teachers like me, I started football and I realized that I was better than everybody else at sports. I hung out with older kids. Played with them and because I was good I became accepted. Both of the older ones and the ones at the same age. I became popular.
The second shift was not as dramatic. It was a slow process. But I would say it happened when I was around twelve or thirteen. I wasn’t best anymore. There were people who were better than me at sports now. And I read a lot. And slowly I started to question everything. What is right or wrong? What is the truth? Why do we live? Is everything an illusion? Does nothing matter? I became distant. Walking be myself, thinking. Didn’t care much about anything. Btw, that was cool not to care and I still did good in school and sports. I got a nickname. Philosopher. I became uncertain about everything. And I thought I was better than everybody else. Haha, so childish everybody acts. Grow up.
The third shift. Eighteen. I’ve read and read and read. Now I realized, what and where have all this knowledge brought me. I started to struggle at school, I realized that I wouldn’t become a superstar, I still lived at home, I have no job and I didn’t know what to do. I was a useless piece of shit. I started to try to change my life. Slowly, testing things I’ve read about. Got a job, graduated, got my own apartment and started university. Not thanks to my grades, but högskoleprovet.
Latest shift, 2012? I put a questionmark on this one. Almost got a bachelor in business administration. Still working in the same job, still had my apartment. But something is wrong. I’m heading into the rat race without realizing it. That’s not what I want. My mindset was, first I get rich then I have fun. But can’t you have fun and become rich in the same time. Two childhood dreams, Dive at the great barrier reef and hike in the rocky mountains. Fuck this! My education haven’t gotten me a better job and if I continue to work in the same job it would take forever to get rich. I’m heading for Australia.
Now, one of the dreams is accomplished. I met people that have showed me another world. A world I want to be a part of. You don’t have to have money to travel. It will work out. You can work as you travel. And there are so many beautiful places that I can see. That I want to see. Nothing is stopping Me. I don’t have to go back and work an ordinary job. I will probably live til I’m sixty or seventy. Plenty of time to work. I won’t be young forever. Actually, I’m beginning to feel old. Even if I only live til I become thirty, do I want to work all those years?
Is this the next shift? Or will I get home and go back to my old life?